
[SCENE: The high end car room in the mansion garage. A shiny black Lincoln limousine with open passenger door. A well dressed older man in formal black with a neat beard is saying something into a cellphone as scene opens. The door to the hallway opens and two women dressed to the nines in formal black enter]
Bernie: I see you women are dressed to kill....no pun intended.
Fanny: I just remembered that I hate heels.
Doris: High heels make me feel sexy...
Fanny: And taller...as if at six foot, three inches you need to be taller, O blond princess.
Doris: I guess I like men to look up to me.
Bernie: Can we skip the comedy act, heh? Serious business tonight.
Fanny: It's just our way of dealing with the tension.
Bernie: I had a little final briefing to give you girls, but I think it's all been said.
Fanny: Ours is not to reason why...
Doris: We are ready to hit Red Beach, Sergeant Rock, sir.
Bernie: Any questions, Marines?
Fanny: I have one small one: Where are the guns, equipment and uniforms? Or do we love them to death?
Bernie: In the very large trunk of the limo. After the reception we dress again for the 48th floor assault.
Fanny: Won't the other drivers in the garage find that a little odd?
Bernie: Very likely. This is why we will parking in the secured VIP section. We will have complete privacy and more than an hour to get ready after the mayor's reception for journalists concludes.
Doris: This thanks to Harold. Also, I bet we get the limo into the garage without a search.
Fanny: We are trusted VIPs, after all...
Bernie: If there are no more questions or comments, just be seated in the Lincoln. [The two women slide into leather seat at the rear of the Lincoln] The Prud is about a 45 minute drive from here. I will be driving. When we get to the Prud, you two will be greeted by the help. Then just follow the crowd into the ballroom. At the entrance, a lackey will check your names off a list. Then you're in like Flint. Enjoy the party, but no more than one drink. Mingle. Make new friends! I'll join you in about 20 minutes.
Fanny: I thought you were going to draw a line in the sand and ask us to step over it to defend the Alamo, Colonel Travis.
Bernie: I just did.
[Bernie closes the passenger door and gets in the driver's seat. The vehicle starts while the garage door opens to reveal the bight and the lights of downtown Boston in the distance.]
[SCENE: Ballroom entrance to the Prudential Building in downtown Boston. This is a gala production like the premier of a new Hollywood movie in Los Angeles. A queue of limousines are backed out into the street, as one by one they pull up to the doormen and greeters, who point them to the entrance of the ballroom. A crowd has gathered and cheer the occasional well known public person.]
[SCENE: Inside the limo carrying Fanny and Doris. The camera is focused on the two women who are looking at some I.D.s and etc. talking low to each other. The tinny of voice of Bernie on the intercom interrupts...]
Bernie: Head's up Marines and get in character – We are up next.
Fanny: About time! Did every little Leftist parasite in the Northeast show up tonight?
Doris: Free food, drink and a photo op with the commie mayor of Boston: A freeloader paradise!
Bernie: The role you ladies will play for the next couple of hours are journalist. The name of your publication is The Seattle Slimes. I will be playing the role of your boss, Mr. John Turley, just as soon as I get this cruise ship docked in the private VIP parking garage. Okay...here we are!
[The limousine glides to at a stop and the ballroom crew opens the door for Fanny and Doris. The crowd along both sides of the rope line span their faces, but remain silent as no one recognizes them. The two women ignore the crowd, whose attention is drawn to a man and woman who dismount from the limo behind theirs just after Bernie disappears.]
Elderly Woman: [Loud] IT'S JANE FONDA! Who is the man with her?
Older Man: [LOUD] IT'S HANOI JANE FONDA, THE TRAITOR-BITCH! BOO! BOO!
Elderly Woman: [slaps man on the side of the head] I'll have you know that Ms. Fonda is a famous actress and....
Man: ...TRAITOR-BITCH! [Attempts to spit on Fonda as she walks past. Woman at his side slaps him in the face. A mini-riot breaks out as the pro and anti Jane Fonda factions go at it. Police and hotel security guards attempt to separate the fighters and restore order.]
[SCENE: Entrance queue at the ballroom for the unknown guests. Fanny and Doris are waiting patiently in this line as an elderly and clearly upset Jane Fonda rushes past them with heavy security into the ballroom.]
Fanny: Doris, I believe that was Jane Fonda...
Doris: She is still alive. I thought she had died! How old is she? About 100?
Fanny: In her late 70s or early 80s. Evil never dies.
Doris: I can't believe Nixon didn't have her arrested after that highly unauthorized photo op to Hanoi in the middle of a war.
Fanny: I can. Nixon was into appeasement of the American Left. It didn't help him. There is a lesson here...
[The two women are at the head of the line. The security guard checks their “papers” against a guest list. He checks them off and another well dressed lackey greets them and says..]
Lackey: If you ladies will follow me.
[Fanny and Doris fall in behind the teenager and he leads them into the central part of the ballroom. It is a grand affair done in post modern will lots of glass and space. The dance floor where they stand allows the guests to look up at several tiers that now swarm with well dressed people. An orchestra is seated in the rear and softly playing something classical by Mozart.]
Lackey: Over this way [pointing] is the food buffet and over there [pointing] is the wet bar. Everything is free. Enjoy! [Disappears quickly as if he fears being seen in their company]
Fanny: No respect for The Seattle Slimes here, I see!
Doris: Well they are a bunch of commies, you know...and we are the opposition media. I can imagine MSNBC wouldn't be greeted with open arms at a political function hosted by Free Republic.
Fanny: If the Leftist staff knows about our newspaper, then it really must exist! I never heard of it until yesterday when Uncle Bernie gave us the script.
Doris: If you went shopping at the supermarket more, you would know the TSS is right up near the checkout counter beside The National Enquirer.
Fanny: “Doing the job the State Controlled Media won't do?”
Doris: You got it, girlfriend! And we cover the zombie stories too!
Fanny: What about the vampire stories?
Doris: Really, Fancine...there are no such thing as vampires...
Fanny: Why do I need a drink?
[The two women walk towards the free bar through the crowd. When they arrive, they notice it is mobbed. A man yells something to them and waves. They turn and notice two young men drinking champagne from a large chilled bottle on a small round table. Fanny and Doris walk over to join them]
Young Man #1: I'm Fred and this is my pal Chuck. We have the booze because we paid for it. If you want the freebees, be prepared to wait an hour. The other option is join us in our effort to destroy a bottle of expensive French champagne.
Chuck: The down side is that we are on “The Other Side” - National Review.
[The girls join them at the table. Chuck jumps up and holds a chair for Fanny. The tall Fred with red hair, does the same for the tall blond Doris.]
Fanny: NR, What luck! TSS here! I'm Karen Longstreet and my co-worker is Sally Hanson.
[Chuck pours a glass of champagne for Fanny in a fresh glass, then does the same for Fred and Doris. He refills his glass as well. The foursome click glasses and start to drink]
Fred: I love the zombie stories at TSS! Can we talk insider information? The zombies are allegory for the American Left.
Doris: You found us out, oh clever one!
Fred: I knew it!
Fanny: And the Leftists still think the TSS is serious about the zombies..[laughs]
Chuck: Well Leftists as a rule aren't very intelligent...I recently did an article for NR on this very issue. It is a fact – the majority of Lefties have below average I.Q.s.
Doris: Mayor O'Reilly's favorite Democrat politician, Mark Smithson, is very intelligent.
Fanny: ...and very evil. A dangerous combination...I don't agree that the president's idea of giving a radical like him control of the Department of Labor in order to “watch him” was a good idea. It reminds me of the Wiemar Republic and a Chancellor named Hitler...
Fred: As is well known, the contemporary Democrat Party and the Communist Party are one and the same....They have merged just like the Nationalist Party and National Socialist Party in the the Third Reich merged in the early 1930s.
Doris: Look what happened to the Republican Party? They have have become a fascist party under our latest president...
Fred: [kicking back a glass of champagne and pouring another] So what's next for the USA? Communism or Nazism? The optimists pray for fascism and the defeatists say socialism.
Fanny: And what does a drunk realist like you say?
Fred: The Republic is dead...gone...finished!
Doris: No hope?
Chuck: None for this government...Reform is impossible! It's been tried too many times to mention. The time has come for destruction...REVOLUTION!
Fanny: It would appear that you and Smithson do have one thing in common!
Doris: The American patriot is always a revolutionist. If government becomes oppressive, it is our sacred duty to reform or destroy it...
Fred: [Clearly drunk] I love you, tall and blond! Can we get married?
Doris: I have a guy already, but I'll keep the offer in mind in case things don't work out. [laughs]
Fanny: So Chuck, we get our guns and go to Washington, D.C. and shoot the current government?
Chuck: For a start...
Fred: Shooting is too good for the bastards...hang 'em high says me!
Chuck: [pulling the glass out of his hand] You have been cut off, Fred Baldwin!
Doris: [refilling her glass]...and the first thing we do is shoot the lawyers...
Fred: I'd drink to that, except the bar just closed for me.
[Fanny's purse rings. She takes out her cellphone and answers.]
Fanny: We have to leave you guys, the boss calls us to duty.
[The two women finish their drinks and say their goodbyes to the men. They dodge the drinkers and move back towards the entrance looking for Bernie. A loud voice yells...]
Chuck: Karen! Karen Longstreet! [Fanny ignores him. Finally he catches up with her retreating figure and pulls her around.]
Fanny: I'm sorry, Chuck, but the big boss wants to talk to me and...
Chuck: I knew it! You are not Karen Longstreet. You're Fanny Kaplan, the writer-actor-director of an independent film produced at Universal Studios in Orlando, Florida titled, “Working Girls” and that (pointing at Doris) is your co-star, Doris Hoffman.
[Doris has stopped just out of earshot and is looking at the two with concern. Bernie joins her and starts over to them, but Doris stops him. The rest of the crowd is not interested and continue talking to one another in dozens of private conversations.]
Fanny: Charles Morris? The movie critic for NR? I remember reading your review of my first movie. It was very fair and objective. I was quite pleased that review, especially as it appeared in the national media. So let me thank you....
[Chuck is looking at Fanny with amazement]
Chuck: You admit that you're a liar? That you crashed a party by means of identity theft?
Fanny: [Smiles an innocent smile] It's only identity theft if there really is a “Karen Longstreet” at the TSS and there isn't...
[Bernie and Doris walk over]
Bernie: I'm sorry young man, but I need this woman for legal business reasons. I'm her boss.
Fanny: He knows I'm not Karen Longstreet...He saw “Working Girls.” He's a film critic and journalist for National Review.
Doris: Do we shoot him?
Chuck: If that is suppose to be funny, it isn't.
Fanny: No joke, you have three guns pointed at you.
[The trio surround Chuck. Fanny moves close and sticks a gun in Chuck's side.]
Bernie: The way this goes down, we take you to the parking garage, tie you up and lock you in the trunk of a limousine for a few hours.]
Chuck: Then what?
Bernie: That depends...but as it stands now, you face certain death, Fanny will shoot you.
Fanny: It would be a pity; however, this nosey parker should have practiced MYOB.
Chuck: MYOB?
Fanny: “Mind Your Own Business.”
Bernie: Let's go.
[SCENE: Doris, Fanny and Chuck are seated in the back of the Lincoln limousine. Chuck has been tied up with duct tape around the hands and feet. On a small table in the center are personal items taken from the pockets of Chuck. Fanny is going through the wallet pulling out items. There is a loud bump. Bernie opens the door and gets in.]
Bernie: Cancel that idea. There is no room in the trunk. He isn't going in there anyhow.
Fanny: It is amazing all the trouble one little drink can cause...we should have kept walking.
Doris: I was there too. I'm to blame as well! It takes two to tango...
Bernie: What did I say earlier? A plan is only good until the first shoot is fired.
Doris: This is the part where the training pays off..Adapt to the situation...
Bernie: We either have to shoot you in the next 30 minutes or let you go.
Chuck: Speaking as the personal representative of Charles Morris, I say let him go. He will remain silent.
Fanny: [Looking at a picture of a 13 year old boy holding a Torah] You're a Jew?
Chuck: Well let's see...my mother was a Jew...My father was a Jew...
Fanny: Cut the tape. He's with us. The three of us are Jews too.
Doris: But he might be a Leftist Jew...Most Jews are Lefties, you know...
Fanny: He works for National Review. I've read his articles. He's a stalwart Republican! And [She holds up a booklet] a pocket size U.S. Constitution that includes the Declaration of Independence. Leftists never carry these documents unless they're out of toilet paper and on their way to the bathroom.
[Bernie takes out a pocket knife and cuts the bonds, Chuck pulls off the tape and silently gathers his personal effects and returns them to his pockets. The trio look ashamed and glum. When Chuck finishes up, he opens the door and steps out, but leans back in with his right hand and holding above the door to keep his balance.]
Chuck: When I was a kid, my favorite television program was “Hogan's Heroes.” My favorite character was that big fat German sergeant who always told the POWs when he caught them red handed doing resistance work, “I know nothing, I see nothing, I hear nothing.”
[Chuck smiles and walks away with his hands in his pockets while whistling the “Hogan's Heroes” music score that echoes in the deserted parking garage.]
Fanny: He won't say anything...he's with us.
Bernie: Even if he doesn't know it yet...I sense a righteous man.
Doris: [picking up a business card off the floor] Look what I found, Chuck's business card.
Fanny: It was not left behind by mistake...He wants us to make contact.
Doris: What now?
Bernie: I'm waiting for Smithson appearance upstairs...Just before I called Fanny, Harold called to tell me that Smithson made a short appearance and went up to the 48th floor. We stand by here until I get the head's up from Harold...wait...[a tinny voice says something via earphones to Bernie. He listens intently for several minutes then speaks] Okay, thanks Harold [Bernie is speaking into a small microphone on his coat collar]
Fanny: Well?
Bernie: The deal is that Smithson is on the 48th floor conference alone with an attractive woman.
Doris: The horny bastard!
Bernie: It's not sex. Apparently the woman is a Communist spy by the name of Phoebe Myers with secret Wjite House information. What she has told Smithson, and duly recorded by Harold, is a game changer. She also has given him a computer data storage device that contains the document backing up her story.
Fanny: So the mission is canceled?
Bernie: No way! [The tinny voice again] Harold says the woman is leaving and Smithson is reading the documents on his laptop. He shows no sign of going back downstairs.
Doris: It's time for the reception to end...
Bernie: The building will be empty in about an hour...at 10 P.M. - Let's get ready for the Combat Assault.
[SCENE: About an hour later in the private VIP garage. The trio are dressed in black uniforms and are doing a last minute weapon's check.]
Fanny: No last warning?
Doris: Would it have done any good?
Bernie: David Hunter told me they were given several warning over the last few months to step down, or face “termination with extreme prejudice.” I gather from Harold's updates that Smithson and his buds upstairs have doubled down on treason.
Fanny: And treason carries the death sentence...
Bernie: We have it all on DVD in living color...When we leave tonight with Harold, we will be taking the evidence with us.
Bernie: [Tinny voice in ear says something] Okay, Marines, the building is now locked down and all civilians, including the security guards have departed...No one inside The Prud but the good guys and the bad guys...Let's suit up.
[The three don bullet proof jackets, ski masks and kevlar helmets. The trio are now dressed head to toe in black combat uniforms. It is difficult to tell the man from the women. They pick up the weapons to load and lock them with a magazine. When this is done, Bernie gives the infantry signal by hand for “follow me” and they enter the freight elevator. The door closes...]
[SCENE: Conference room on 48th floor. The room is full of cigarette smoke. A black man with a bald head seated at the head of conference table is listening to someone.]
Smithson: I agree with most of your reservations, but what choice do we have? The fascists will conduct a coup. Our best chance to create the United Socialist States of America is to move first.
Woman: My Red Guards can do this...We kill the president, vice president and the shadow government minsters...What's left?
Man: [to her left] Ms. Steinberg you are forgetting about the military. Do you expect Conway to do nothing?
Steinberg: Mr. Manson, who said Conway would be alive when our putsch happens? General Stevens of the USAF, a secret comrade since he was 19, will be Chairman of the JCS.
Manson: If your Red Guards can get rid of Conway, I see no reason why the putsch cannot succeed.
Smithson: Conway is well guarded.
Steinberg: My people have discovered a way to assassinate him. Czar Alexander III was well guarded, but the assassins found a weak link in his security fence. If a Russian Czar can be killed at high noon in the middle of St.Petersburg, an American general in Washington, D.C. will present no problem.
Smithson: Then we are in agreement? The revolution begins with a bold strike against the leaders of the old regime...Let's vote. [Everyone of the 23 (except for Smithson's secretary) seated at the table raises his or her party card in agreement]
[SCENE: There is loud gunfire outside the room. Suddenly the door literally flies across the room followed by three figures dressed in black with weapons at the ready]
Bernie: Hands up and against the wall!
[SCENE: The stunned Communists do as they are ordered...except for Smithson. He pulls out a pistol and shoots one of the black figures in the chest who goes down. The two survivor open up with automatic weapons fire that takes down all the Communists, starting with Smithson, When the massacre is complete, Doris pulls off her mask and helmet, and begins to check the fallen friend for wounds. She joined by Bernie who continues to undress Fanny looking for wounds and checking her pulse. Fanny moans...]
Bernie: She will okay, the vest stopped the round. Help me drag her outside. She will be just fine!
[Bernie and Doris drag Fanny outside. Bernie returns and pulls out a pistol and delivers the coup de grace to each of the fallen and bloody Communists. He runs out of ammunition after fifteen rounds and stops to reload. This is when he notices that a badly wounded Smithson is trying to crawl out of the room. He walks over to him and points the gun at the back of Smithson's head. The man feeling something ominous rolls over to face Bernie.]
Bernie: SIC SEMPER TYRANNIS! [He fires and blows apart Smithson's face]
[Bernie continues the shooting until each of the Communists are shot in the head. He moves the body of the dead secretary and gathers up the documents and Smithson's laptop which go into his backpack. After this is done he carefully checks out the room one final time before his exit.]
[SCENE: Outside the conference room. Fanny has been placed up against a wall opposite the conference room door by Doris, who has opened a well stocked First Aid kit, and is talking to Fanny as she searches for medicine. Bernie walks past the bodies of the two obviously dead Communist security guards, then returns to shoot both in the head,]
Doris: Very professional Bernie, always put the last round in the old brain bucket just to be sure!
Bernie: How's Fanny?
Fanny: Hurting! I feel like I got hit by a truck!
Bernie: Excellent!
Doris: [frowning] Excellent?
Bernie: Feeling pain from a gunshot wound is good. It means you're still alive.
Doris: I give! What can I do for her? She's not bleeding...pain killers?
Bernie: Just keep her talking and awake. We don't want her going into shock.
Doris: What about getting her to the ER?
Fanny: No...I can handle the pain. If I go to the ER with a gunshot wound, the cops get called...
Bernie: [Looking down at her naked chest] Your chest and boobs are going to look like hell for a few weeks, but you should heal okay...you're not bleeding from the mouth, so the lungs are okay...Ready to stand up?
[Bernie and Doris on either side pull Fanny to her feet and the trio start walking down a corridor to the freight elevator. Doris returns to put the First Aid kit back in her backpack. Then she pulls a red rose in plastic out of pocket with gloved hand and throws into the conference room.]
Bernie: I see you women are dressed to kill....no pun intended.
Fanny: I just remembered that I hate heels.
Doris: High heels make me feel sexy...
Fanny: And taller...as if at six foot, three inches you need to be taller, O blond princess.
Doris: I guess I like men to look up to me.
Bernie: Can we skip the comedy act, heh? Serious business tonight.
Fanny: It's just our way of dealing with the tension.
Bernie: I had a little final briefing to give you girls, but I think it's all been said.
Fanny: Ours is not to reason why...
Doris: We are ready to hit Red Beach, Sergeant Rock, sir.
Bernie: Any questions, Marines?
Fanny: I have one small one: Where are the guns, equipment and uniforms? Or do we love them to death?
Bernie: In the very large trunk of the limo. After the reception we dress again for the 48th floor assault.
Fanny: Won't the other drivers in the garage find that a little odd?
Bernie: Very likely. This is why we will parking in the secured VIP section. We will have complete privacy and more than an hour to get ready after the mayor's reception for journalists concludes.
Doris: This thanks to Harold. Also, I bet we get the limo into the garage without a search.
Fanny: We are trusted VIPs, after all...
Bernie: If there are no more questions or comments, just be seated in the Lincoln. [The two women slide into leather seat at the rear of the Lincoln] The Prud is about a 45 minute drive from here. I will be driving. When we get to the Prud, you two will be greeted by the help. Then just follow the crowd into the ballroom. At the entrance, a lackey will check your names off a list. Then you're in like Flint. Enjoy the party, but no more than one drink. Mingle. Make new friends! I'll join you in about 20 minutes.
Fanny: I thought you were going to draw a line in the sand and ask us to step over it to defend the Alamo, Colonel Travis.
Bernie: I just did.
[Bernie closes the passenger door and gets in the driver's seat. The vehicle starts while the garage door opens to reveal the bight and the lights of downtown Boston in the distance.]
[SCENE: Ballroom entrance to the Prudential Building in downtown Boston. This is a gala production like the premier of a new Hollywood movie in Los Angeles. A queue of limousines are backed out into the street, as one by one they pull up to the doormen and greeters, who point them to the entrance of the ballroom. A crowd has gathered and cheer the occasional well known public person.]
[SCENE: Inside the limo carrying Fanny and Doris. The camera is focused on the two women who are looking at some I.D.s and etc. talking low to each other. The tinny of voice of Bernie on the intercom interrupts...]
Bernie: Head's up Marines and get in character – We are up next.
Fanny: About time! Did every little Leftist parasite in the Northeast show up tonight?
Doris: Free food, drink and a photo op with the commie mayor of Boston: A freeloader paradise!
Bernie: The role you ladies will play for the next couple of hours are journalist. The name of your publication is The Seattle Slimes. I will be playing the role of your boss, Mr. John Turley, just as soon as I get this cruise ship docked in the private VIP parking garage. Okay...here we are!
[The limousine glides to at a stop and the ballroom crew opens the door for Fanny and Doris. The crowd along both sides of the rope line span their faces, but remain silent as no one recognizes them. The two women ignore the crowd, whose attention is drawn to a man and woman who dismount from the limo behind theirs just after Bernie disappears.]
Elderly Woman: [Loud] IT'S JANE FONDA! Who is the man with her?
Older Man: [LOUD] IT'S HANOI JANE FONDA, THE TRAITOR-BITCH! BOO! BOO!
Elderly Woman: [slaps man on the side of the head] I'll have you know that Ms. Fonda is a famous actress and....
Man: ...TRAITOR-BITCH! [Attempts to spit on Fonda as she walks past. Woman at his side slaps him in the face. A mini-riot breaks out as the pro and anti Jane Fonda factions go at it. Police and hotel security guards attempt to separate the fighters and restore order.]
[SCENE: Entrance queue at the ballroom for the unknown guests. Fanny and Doris are waiting patiently in this line as an elderly and clearly upset Jane Fonda rushes past them with heavy security into the ballroom.]
Fanny: Doris, I believe that was Jane Fonda...
Doris: She is still alive. I thought she had died! How old is she? About 100?
Fanny: In her late 70s or early 80s. Evil never dies.
Doris: I can't believe Nixon didn't have her arrested after that highly unauthorized photo op to Hanoi in the middle of a war.
Fanny: I can. Nixon was into appeasement of the American Left. It didn't help him. There is a lesson here...
[The two women are at the head of the line. The security guard checks their “papers” against a guest list. He checks them off and another well dressed lackey greets them and says..]
Lackey: If you ladies will follow me.
[Fanny and Doris fall in behind the teenager and he leads them into the central part of the ballroom. It is a grand affair done in post modern will lots of glass and space. The dance floor where they stand allows the guests to look up at several tiers that now swarm with well dressed people. An orchestra is seated in the rear and softly playing something classical by Mozart.]
Lackey: Over this way [pointing] is the food buffet and over there [pointing] is the wet bar. Everything is free. Enjoy! [Disappears quickly as if he fears being seen in their company]
Fanny: No respect for The Seattle Slimes here, I see!
Doris: Well they are a bunch of commies, you know...and we are the opposition media. I can imagine MSNBC wouldn't be greeted with open arms at a political function hosted by Free Republic.
Fanny: If the Leftist staff knows about our newspaper, then it really must exist! I never heard of it until yesterday when Uncle Bernie gave us the script.
Doris: If you went shopping at the supermarket more, you would know the TSS is right up near the checkout counter beside The National Enquirer.
Fanny: “Doing the job the State Controlled Media won't do?”
Doris: You got it, girlfriend! And we cover the zombie stories too!
Fanny: What about the vampire stories?
Doris: Really, Fancine...there are no such thing as vampires...
Fanny: Why do I need a drink?
[The two women walk towards the free bar through the crowd. When they arrive, they notice it is mobbed. A man yells something to them and waves. They turn and notice two young men drinking champagne from a large chilled bottle on a small round table. Fanny and Doris walk over to join them]
Young Man #1: I'm Fred and this is my pal Chuck. We have the booze because we paid for it. If you want the freebees, be prepared to wait an hour. The other option is join us in our effort to destroy a bottle of expensive French champagne.
Chuck: The down side is that we are on “The Other Side” - National Review.
[The girls join them at the table. Chuck jumps up and holds a chair for Fanny. The tall Fred with red hair, does the same for the tall blond Doris.]
Fanny: NR, What luck! TSS here! I'm Karen Longstreet and my co-worker is Sally Hanson.
[Chuck pours a glass of champagne for Fanny in a fresh glass, then does the same for Fred and Doris. He refills his glass as well. The foursome click glasses and start to drink]
Fred: I love the zombie stories at TSS! Can we talk insider information? The zombies are allegory for the American Left.
Doris: You found us out, oh clever one!
Fred: I knew it!
Fanny: And the Leftists still think the TSS is serious about the zombies..[laughs]
Chuck: Well Leftists as a rule aren't very intelligent...I recently did an article for NR on this very issue. It is a fact – the majority of Lefties have below average I.Q.s.
Doris: Mayor O'Reilly's favorite Democrat politician, Mark Smithson, is very intelligent.
Fanny: ...and very evil. A dangerous combination...I don't agree that the president's idea of giving a radical like him control of the Department of Labor in order to “watch him” was a good idea. It reminds me of the Wiemar Republic and a Chancellor named Hitler...
Fred: As is well known, the contemporary Democrat Party and the Communist Party are one and the same....They have merged just like the Nationalist Party and National Socialist Party in the the Third Reich merged in the early 1930s.
Doris: Look what happened to the Republican Party? They have have become a fascist party under our latest president...
Fred: [kicking back a glass of champagne and pouring another] So what's next for the USA? Communism or Nazism? The optimists pray for fascism and the defeatists say socialism.
Fanny: And what does a drunk realist like you say?
Fred: The Republic is dead...gone...finished!
Doris: No hope?
Chuck: None for this government...Reform is impossible! It's been tried too many times to mention. The time has come for destruction...REVOLUTION!
Fanny: It would appear that you and Smithson do have one thing in common!
Doris: The American patriot is always a revolutionist. If government becomes oppressive, it is our sacred duty to reform or destroy it...
Fred: [Clearly drunk] I love you, tall and blond! Can we get married?
Doris: I have a guy already, but I'll keep the offer in mind in case things don't work out. [laughs]
Fanny: So Chuck, we get our guns and go to Washington, D.C. and shoot the current government?
Chuck: For a start...
Fred: Shooting is too good for the bastards...hang 'em high says me!
Chuck: [pulling the glass out of his hand] You have been cut off, Fred Baldwin!
Doris: [refilling her glass]...and the first thing we do is shoot the lawyers...
Fred: I'd drink to that, except the bar just closed for me.
[Fanny's purse rings. She takes out her cellphone and answers.]
Fanny: We have to leave you guys, the boss calls us to duty.
[The two women finish their drinks and say their goodbyes to the men. They dodge the drinkers and move back towards the entrance looking for Bernie. A loud voice yells...]
Chuck: Karen! Karen Longstreet! [Fanny ignores him. Finally he catches up with her retreating figure and pulls her around.]
Fanny: I'm sorry, Chuck, but the big boss wants to talk to me and...
Chuck: I knew it! You are not Karen Longstreet. You're Fanny Kaplan, the writer-actor-director of an independent film produced at Universal Studios in Orlando, Florida titled, “Working Girls” and that (pointing at Doris) is your co-star, Doris Hoffman.
[Doris has stopped just out of earshot and is looking at the two with concern. Bernie joins her and starts over to them, but Doris stops him. The rest of the crowd is not interested and continue talking to one another in dozens of private conversations.]
Fanny: Charles Morris? The movie critic for NR? I remember reading your review of my first movie. It was very fair and objective. I was quite pleased that review, especially as it appeared in the national media. So let me thank you....
[Chuck is looking at Fanny with amazement]
Chuck: You admit that you're a liar? That you crashed a party by means of identity theft?
Fanny: [Smiles an innocent smile] It's only identity theft if there really is a “Karen Longstreet” at the TSS and there isn't...
[Bernie and Doris walk over]
Bernie: I'm sorry young man, but I need this woman for legal business reasons. I'm her boss.
Fanny: He knows I'm not Karen Longstreet...He saw “Working Girls.” He's a film critic and journalist for National Review.
Doris: Do we shoot him?
Chuck: If that is suppose to be funny, it isn't.
Fanny: No joke, you have three guns pointed at you.
[The trio surround Chuck. Fanny moves close and sticks a gun in Chuck's side.]
Bernie: The way this goes down, we take you to the parking garage, tie you up and lock you in the trunk of a limousine for a few hours.]
Chuck: Then what?
Bernie: That depends...but as it stands now, you face certain death, Fanny will shoot you.
Fanny: It would be a pity; however, this nosey parker should have practiced MYOB.
Chuck: MYOB?
Fanny: “Mind Your Own Business.”
Bernie: Let's go.
[SCENE: Doris, Fanny and Chuck are seated in the back of the Lincoln limousine. Chuck has been tied up with duct tape around the hands and feet. On a small table in the center are personal items taken from the pockets of Chuck. Fanny is going through the wallet pulling out items. There is a loud bump. Bernie opens the door and gets in.]
Bernie: Cancel that idea. There is no room in the trunk. He isn't going in there anyhow.
Fanny: It is amazing all the trouble one little drink can cause...we should have kept walking.
Doris: I was there too. I'm to blame as well! It takes two to tango...
Bernie: What did I say earlier? A plan is only good until the first shoot is fired.
Doris: This is the part where the training pays off..Adapt to the situation...
Bernie: We either have to shoot you in the next 30 minutes or let you go.
Chuck: Speaking as the personal representative of Charles Morris, I say let him go. He will remain silent.
Fanny: [Looking at a picture of a 13 year old boy holding a Torah] You're a Jew?
Chuck: Well let's see...my mother was a Jew...My father was a Jew...
Fanny: Cut the tape. He's with us. The three of us are Jews too.
Doris: But he might be a Leftist Jew...Most Jews are Lefties, you know...
Fanny: He works for National Review. I've read his articles. He's a stalwart Republican! And [She holds up a booklet] a pocket size U.S. Constitution that includes the Declaration of Independence. Leftists never carry these documents unless they're out of toilet paper and on their way to the bathroom.
[Bernie takes out a pocket knife and cuts the bonds, Chuck pulls off the tape and silently gathers his personal effects and returns them to his pockets. The trio look ashamed and glum. When Chuck finishes up, he opens the door and steps out, but leans back in with his right hand and holding above the door to keep his balance.]
Chuck: When I was a kid, my favorite television program was “Hogan's Heroes.” My favorite character was that big fat German sergeant who always told the POWs when he caught them red handed doing resistance work, “I know nothing, I see nothing, I hear nothing.”
[Chuck smiles and walks away with his hands in his pockets while whistling the “Hogan's Heroes” music score that echoes in the deserted parking garage.]
Fanny: He won't say anything...he's with us.
Bernie: Even if he doesn't know it yet...I sense a righteous man.
Doris: [picking up a business card off the floor] Look what I found, Chuck's business card.
Fanny: It was not left behind by mistake...He wants us to make contact.
Doris: What now?
Bernie: I'm waiting for Smithson appearance upstairs...Just before I called Fanny, Harold called to tell me that Smithson made a short appearance and went up to the 48th floor. We stand by here until I get the head's up from Harold...wait...[a tinny voice says something via earphones to Bernie. He listens intently for several minutes then speaks] Okay, thanks Harold [Bernie is speaking into a small microphone on his coat collar]
Fanny: Well?
Bernie: The deal is that Smithson is on the 48th floor conference alone with an attractive woman.
Doris: The horny bastard!
Bernie: It's not sex. Apparently the woman is a Communist spy by the name of Phoebe Myers with secret Wjite House information. What she has told Smithson, and duly recorded by Harold, is a game changer. She also has given him a computer data storage device that contains the document backing up her story.
Fanny: So the mission is canceled?
Bernie: No way! [The tinny voice again] Harold says the woman is leaving and Smithson is reading the documents on his laptop. He shows no sign of going back downstairs.
Doris: It's time for the reception to end...
Bernie: The building will be empty in about an hour...at 10 P.M. - Let's get ready for the Combat Assault.
[SCENE: About an hour later in the private VIP garage. The trio are dressed in black uniforms and are doing a last minute weapon's check.]
Fanny: No last warning?
Doris: Would it have done any good?
Bernie: David Hunter told me they were given several warning over the last few months to step down, or face “termination with extreme prejudice.” I gather from Harold's updates that Smithson and his buds upstairs have doubled down on treason.
Fanny: And treason carries the death sentence...
Bernie: We have it all on DVD in living color...When we leave tonight with Harold, we will be taking the evidence with us.
Bernie: [Tinny voice in ear says something] Okay, Marines, the building is now locked down and all civilians, including the security guards have departed...No one inside The Prud but the good guys and the bad guys...Let's suit up.
[The three don bullet proof jackets, ski masks and kevlar helmets. The trio are now dressed head to toe in black combat uniforms. It is difficult to tell the man from the women. They pick up the weapons to load and lock them with a magazine. When this is done, Bernie gives the infantry signal by hand for “follow me” and they enter the freight elevator. The door closes...]
[SCENE: Conference room on 48th floor. The room is full of cigarette smoke. A black man with a bald head seated at the head of conference table is listening to someone.]
Smithson: I agree with most of your reservations, but what choice do we have? The fascists will conduct a coup. Our best chance to create the United Socialist States of America is to move first.
Woman: My Red Guards can do this...We kill the president, vice president and the shadow government minsters...What's left?
Man: [to her left] Ms. Steinberg you are forgetting about the military. Do you expect Conway to do nothing?
Steinberg: Mr. Manson, who said Conway would be alive when our putsch happens? General Stevens of the USAF, a secret comrade since he was 19, will be Chairman of the JCS.
Manson: If your Red Guards can get rid of Conway, I see no reason why the putsch cannot succeed.
Smithson: Conway is well guarded.
Steinberg: My people have discovered a way to assassinate him. Czar Alexander III was well guarded, but the assassins found a weak link in his security fence. If a Russian Czar can be killed at high noon in the middle of St.Petersburg, an American general in Washington, D.C. will present no problem.
Smithson: Then we are in agreement? The revolution begins with a bold strike against the leaders of the old regime...Let's vote. [Everyone of the 23 (except for Smithson's secretary) seated at the table raises his or her party card in agreement]
[SCENE: There is loud gunfire outside the room. Suddenly the door literally flies across the room followed by three figures dressed in black with weapons at the ready]
Bernie: Hands up and against the wall!
[SCENE: The stunned Communists do as they are ordered...except for Smithson. He pulls out a pistol and shoots one of the black figures in the chest who goes down. The two survivor open up with automatic weapons fire that takes down all the Communists, starting with Smithson, When the massacre is complete, Doris pulls off her mask and helmet, and begins to check the fallen friend for wounds. She joined by Bernie who continues to undress Fanny looking for wounds and checking her pulse. Fanny moans...]
Bernie: She will okay, the vest stopped the round. Help me drag her outside. She will be just fine!
[Bernie and Doris drag Fanny outside. Bernie returns and pulls out a pistol and delivers the coup de grace to each of the fallen and bloody Communists. He runs out of ammunition after fifteen rounds and stops to reload. This is when he notices that a badly wounded Smithson is trying to crawl out of the room. He walks over to him and points the gun at the back of Smithson's head. The man feeling something ominous rolls over to face Bernie.]
Bernie: SIC SEMPER TYRANNIS! [He fires and blows apart Smithson's face]
[Bernie continues the shooting until each of the Communists are shot in the head. He moves the body of the dead secretary and gathers up the documents and Smithson's laptop which go into his backpack. After this is done he carefully checks out the room one final time before his exit.]
[SCENE: Outside the conference room. Fanny has been placed up against a wall opposite the conference room door by Doris, who has opened a well stocked First Aid kit, and is talking to Fanny as she searches for medicine. Bernie walks past the bodies of the two obviously dead Communist security guards, then returns to shoot both in the head,]
Doris: Very professional Bernie, always put the last round in the old brain bucket just to be sure!
Bernie: How's Fanny?
Fanny: Hurting! I feel like I got hit by a truck!
Bernie: Excellent!
Doris: [frowning] Excellent?
Bernie: Feeling pain from a gunshot wound is good. It means you're still alive.
Doris: I give! What can I do for her? She's not bleeding...pain killers?
Bernie: Just keep her talking and awake. We don't want her going into shock.
Doris: What about getting her to the ER?
Fanny: No...I can handle the pain. If I go to the ER with a gunshot wound, the cops get called...
Bernie: [Looking down at her naked chest] Your chest and boobs are going to look like hell for a few weeks, but you should heal okay...you're not bleeding from the mouth, so the lungs are okay...Ready to stand up?
[Bernie and Doris on either side pull Fanny to her feet and the trio start walking down a corridor to the freight elevator. Doris returns to put the First Aid kit back in her backpack. Then she pulls a red rose in plastic out of pocket with gloved hand and throws into the conference room.]
JOIN THE VAST RIGHT WING CONSPIRACY TODAY!
3 comments:
: - )
good-
Carol-CS
comments are not posting?
C-CS
@Carol:
I play editor with the comments.
But yours are always acceptable.
Post a Comment